Supernatural Magnet

I am currently a postulant for the Capuchin Franciscans in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Perhaps the happiest day of my life was at the Easter Vigil in 1999 when I converted to Catholicism. It was also one of the most humbling.

After I was baptized, received holy Communion, and was confirmed, I was so full of joy that I literally could not stop smiling. Having never experienced joy like this before, I was blown away. Following the Mass there was a reception for all of us catechumens and our families and friends. We had a little party and then it was time to go home.

As happy as I was, on the ride home I began to feel truly repentant. I had never felt this way before. I recalled that as I was going through RCIA the priest, Father Whalen, told me that I would not have to go to confession. Boy, was I relieved. I had never gone to confession before and it scared me.

When I finally felt the desire to go to confession for the first time, I was at the Franciscan University of Steubenville for a young adult conference. It was my second time there but my first time as a Catholic. I was scared because I had never told anyone about the dark things in my soul. It was time to be accountable, and it was difficult.

I held my breath and walked (practically without looking) under the tent that was used as a makeshift confessional. I sat down in the chair and told the priest my sins. After I was done, and as he gave me absolution, I felt an incredible peace hovering around me that was affecting me in an indescribable way. It was very powerful and very peaceful. It was as if I could literally feel God working inside me. It seemed as if He was a supernatural magnet vacuuming out my impurities and filling me with His holy flame. As I walked out from that confession I thought, "Wow! That was awesome!"

I assumed that God would move like that at my next confession, and when He didnít, I was disappointed. But, looking back on it, I now realize God is not a showman performing parlor tricks. He is our living God and always does what is best for our souls.

Craig N. Glantz Philadelphia, Pennsylvania